It's hard not to have negative thoughts...though I'm telling myself to take it easy but I can't. Other than some light twinges, not much major symptoms except for a strong pulling sensation which happened on 5dpt and it lasted for at least 2 minutes. Referred back to my previous post on day 5 and I have the same encounter but it lasted even longer. So not sure this is a good sign a not... =(
Today not much symptoms though except for sore stomach when I try to stretch myself and feeling lethargic which I believed its due to the medication I am inserting. Ever since I started on the progesterone medicine, I have been eating like nobody's business. Been feeling hungry, which I read is the side effect. Haiz...another mimic of pregnancy.
Well trying hard not to think too much of it and praying hard that my menses won't come which is due by next week and at least my hope is up. Read that there is no way for progesterone pills to delay menses so this could be my hint whether I'm successful this time.
Our family vacation is this coming Sunday, got to enjoy myself and not think too much and hope I get good news after I'm back.
Friday, October 17, 2014
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
Another good news in my family!
This morning received a good news. My sister whatsapp me telling me she tested positive! Wow, what a good news for her. So coincidentally I'm also trying for this month and if it happens I'm pregnant, both will be preggie sisters! But not sure if I'm so lucky a not.
But I'm already mentally prepared for the worst to come, so better not pin such high hope. Felt some twinges here and there in my stomach but I believed it is the side effect of the utrogestran.
But I'm already mentally prepared for the worst to come, so better not pin such high hope. Felt some twinges here and there in my stomach but I believed it is the side effect of the utrogestran.
Monday, October 13, 2014
2nd day post transfer (2nd IVF)
Today started to feel something in my stomach. Felt a bit tired and a little cramp.
But I'm thinking it shouldn't be so fast as usually 2nd day post transfer is the day blastocyst hatches out of shell and not attached to lining yet.
Since the first day of transfer, I have been feeling very hungry and appetite improved a lot. Not sure is it myself or its part of the symptoms...so strange. Since then, I have been craving for many things to eat....oh no I don't want to be fat if this time is not a successful one... =(
Hope this is still a good sign after all.
But I'm thinking it shouldn't be so fast as usually 2nd day post transfer is the day blastocyst hatches out of shell and not attached to lining yet.
Since the first day of transfer, I have been feeling very hungry and appetite improved a lot. Not sure is it myself or its part of the symptoms...so strange. Since then, I have been craving for many things to eat....oh no I don't want to be fat if this time is not a successful one... =(
Hope this is still a good sign after all.
Saturday, October 11, 2014
Embryo Transfer (2nd IVF)
Today is the day! Embryo transfer...
Things doesn't go smoothly as planned at first as we intended to put Davian to school before we go for our appointment at 7.30am. I even set the alarm clock at 6am so we can get out of the house on time. We did follow as planned but when we reached school at 6.55am, there is not a single soul of people in the school. The school gate is locked. So I thought we wait for another 5 minutes as the school supposed to opened at 7am. We waited patiently in the car and time has passed about 10 minutes, still not a single soul...we are getting frustrated now...and we decide to move out from the gantry so we will not be charged for the entrance.
We chose to wait for awhile more outside the building but 20 minutes has passed and not even a single teachers turned up. It was already very late so I instruct DH to move on and we got to bring ah boy along...I didn't even prepare any appropriate clothing for him but luckily there is long sleeves in the bag for school but shoes DH has forgotten in the school from the previous day.
I told DH to complain to the head curriculum or principle when he sees them on Monday. Such things shouldn't be tolerated as it disrupted our plan.
We just go ahead as scheduled for the procedure with the naughty one.
When we reached, my stomach was almost filled with water and was trying to endure. The nurse called my number not long after and we proceed with the necessary papers for this procedure. I even checked with the nurse if we could bring kid into the procedure room and she says its ok to bring. Phew...I'm glad he is allowed to enter.
About 1 hr 15 mins later, my name was called to go into the procedure room. Davian started to throw tantrum and making a lot of noise. He wanted me to carry him but there is nothing I could do.
Not long after, Dr Lau came in and he heard how badly ah boy is crying and he asked what happened to him. When I told him he is just throwing tantrum, he gave a very concerning look. This is what I liked about him, he is always so caring.
He told me a good news, that I have 6 embryos together. I was shocked when he told me as I thought the lesser ovum retrieved, means lesser chance of successful embryos. All are of almost good grads. I even heard him say that I'm young so I can have so many good embryos. I was thinking, 2 years ago I was even younger but how come I only have 2?
He suggested that I put in one embryo since I have so many to play with. I was puzzled when he told me this. After that he explained clearly to me. He intend to freeze 2 embryos and further fertilized the rest of the four till day 5 until blastocyst stage and select the best to put in. The chances of day 5 (1 embryo) and day 3 (2 embryos) is the same which is 30%. The only consideration is whether we can accept twins. If we can, he will go ahead with 2 embryos. He mentioned 1st time he don't want to risk till day 5 is because we only have 2 embryos. We have considered for a while and Dr Lau has given us ample time to consider too without rushing us. I find him very professional. While we are considering, he was helping us to handle Davian and surprisingly he is quiet on his arm.
After some time, dear decided to go ahead with 2 embryos and he said if its going to be twins it will be fated. And so Dr Lau went ahead with the procedure.
My little one started crying loudly again when he was handed over to DH...Oh gosh...all the nurses came in to look at him and even laugh at him... =/
Shortly, 2 embryos were in.
Nurse explained to me that they managed to retrieved 9 embryos, 7 fertilized but only 6 are successful and all are of grad four except for one grad 3.
Hope this time I can be at luck too!
Things doesn't go smoothly as planned at first as we intended to put Davian to school before we go for our appointment at 7.30am. I even set the alarm clock at 6am so we can get out of the house on time. We did follow as planned but when we reached school at 6.55am, there is not a single soul of people in the school. The school gate is locked. So I thought we wait for another 5 minutes as the school supposed to opened at 7am. We waited patiently in the car and time has passed about 10 minutes, still not a single soul...we are getting frustrated now...and we decide to move out from the gantry so we will not be charged for the entrance.
We chose to wait for awhile more outside the building but 20 minutes has passed and not even a single teachers turned up. It was already very late so I instruct DH to move on and we got to bring ah boy along...I didn't even prepare any appropriate clothing for him but luckily there is long sleeves in the bag for school but shoes DH has forgotten in the school from the previous day.
I told DH to complain to the head curriculum or principle when he sees them on Monday. Such things shouldn't be tolerated as it disrupted our plan.
We just go ahead as scheduled for the procedure with the naughty one.
When we reached, my stomach was almost filled with water and was trying to endure. The nurse called my number not long after and we proceed with the necessary papers for this procedure. I even checked with the nurse if we could bring kid into the procedure room and she says its ok to bring. Phew...I'm glad he is allowed to enter.
About 1 hr 15 mins later, my name was called to go into the procedure room. Davian started to throw tantrum and making a lot of noise. He wanted me to carry him but there is nothing I could do.
Not long after, Dr Lau came in and he heard how badly ah boy is crying and he asked what happened to him. When I told him he is just throwing tantrum, he gave a very concerning look. This is what I liked about him, he is always so caring.
He told me a good news, that I have 6 embryos together. I was shocked when he told me as I thought the lesser ovum retrieved, means lesser chance of successful embryos. All are of almost good grads. I even heard him say that I'm young so I can have so many good embryos. I was thinking, 2 years ago I was even younger but how come I only have 2?
He suggested that I put in one embryo since I have so many to play with. I was puzzled when he told me this. After that he explained clearly to me. He intend to freeze 2 embryos and further fertilized the rest of the four till day 5 until blastocyst stage and select the best to put in. The chances of day 5 (1 embryo) and day 3 (2 embryos) is the same which is 30%. The only consideration is whether we can accept twins. If we can, he will go ahead with 2 embryos. He mentioned 1st time he don't want to risk till day 5 is because we only have 2 embryos. We have considered for a while and Dr Lau has given us ample time to consider too without rushing us. I find him very professional. While we are considering, he was helping us to handle Davian and surprisingly he is quiet on his arm.
After some time, dear decided to go ahead with 2 embryos and he said if its going to be twins it will be fated. And so Dr Lau went ahead with the procedure.
My little one started crying loudly again when he was handed over to DH...Oh gosh...all the nurses came in to look at him and even laugh at him... =/
Shortly, 2 embryos were in.
Nurse explained to me that they managed to retrieved 9 embryos, 7 fertilized but only 6 are successful and all are of grad four except for one grad 3.
Hope this time I can be at luck too!
Thursday, October 9, 2014
Egg Retrival (2nd IVF)
Went to the clinic early in the morning at 8am after we send Davian to school. Our appointment as scheduled, the nurse was quite prompt and asked to proceed with the necessary before I could start.
DH suppose to take leave to accompany me as before but...he says he has a meeting today and he will leave after he settled his part. Was quite piss with his attitude, taking things for granted this time. Thinking the whole process should be easy on me and I can managed myself.
I have been feeling emotional during the past few days while he is overseas, as I see most couple come together for the treatment whereas me either alone or with my boy and parent. The main support is not there with me to go through this phase.
This time round when he is back to SG, he still continue to give the excuse of not accompanying me and be there as my support.
I was told to change to operating robe and wait patiently at the waiting area to be called. The aesthetic doctor explained everything to me and get me to sign the form. Not long after I was asked to enter the theatre. The whole place looked familiar to me as this was not my first. Dr Lau came in shortly and asked how is my stomach and I replied him that I am doing good. The aesthetic doc gave me the sedative shortly and I feel my vision getting slightly blurred and things started to shift from my vision. If I remembered correctly, previously I was totally knocked out after the jab but this time round I am semi awake and I can still hear the surrounding.
After not long, I hear Dr Lau says total there is 8. Which means total of 8 follicles retrieved I guess. I was a little disappointed as it is actually lesser than before which I have 12. Chances of having good follicles definitely lessen.
I can feel I am pushed to one corner which I believed is the resting lounge to rest. The nurse tried to wake me up and hear my response. Shortly she asked me to wake up and drink a cup of milo. In my heart, all took place so shortly and I'm afraid DH is not ready to fetch me so I hesitate awhile. But they seem so enthusiastic to get me out of bed, so I abide to their instruction to get change and wait at the waiting area for DH. I was done at about 10.30am. So I waited...tick tock, tick tock and almost 1 1/2 hr has passed. He is still not here. Nurse knowing that DH is not here so she asked me to wait outside of the theatre instead. I was getting very sad and emotional at this moment. So I message him again and asked if he is done. He says he is done with the early meeting and he need to go back in the afternoon. I was so angry as he told me he will be taking half day leave today.After that he gave me a call asking if he should come to the clinic to fetch me or I can go down meet him. I told him I am still feeling abit dizzy and cramp. I was very sad and my tears keep rolling...I feel he has been irresponsible and taking things for granted. I am doing this for him and now he seem to push everything to me. Soon after I told him to come find me, I dropped the call.
I didn't continue to wait in the clinic and went out to wait instead as it was very cold in there and I felt so hungry. I waited at the taxi stand and he came after about 30 mins. He started to feel sorry and I rejected his offer to help me.
I asked him to drop me off when we reach home and I will go buy food myself. After that he told me he is not going back to office already. Which means sometimes he can still make the decision but he prefer not to and follows whatever is planned. This is what I hate about him and this shows work is more important than his family.
I told him I have a gut feeling this time I may not be so lucky, and I will not do the procedure again no matter what the result is. The feeling of neglectant is so awful and I feel I am doing all this just for my self and I am fighting hard alone. Though the first time is a smooth process but this time is different especially I have a son who needs my attention and care plus he is not here with me to share the burden.
DH suppose to take leave to accompany me as before but...he says he has a meeting today and he will leave after he settled his part. Was quite piss with his attitude, taking things for granted this time. Thinking the whole process should be easy on me and I can managed myself.
I have been feeling emotional during the past few days while he is overseas, as I see most couple come together for the treatment whereas me either alone or with my boy and parent. The main support is not there with me to go through this phase.
This time round when he is back to SG, he still continue to give the excuse of not accompanying me and be there as my support.
I was told to change to operating robe and wait patiently at the waiting area to be called. The aesthetic doctor explained everything to me and get me to sign the form. Not long after I was asked to enter the theatre. The whole place looked familiar to me as this was not my first. Dr Lau came in shortly and asked how is my stomach and I replied him that I am doing good. The aesthetic doc gave me the sedative shortly and I feel my vision getting slightly blurred and things started to shift from my vision. If I remembered correctly, previously I was totally knocked out after the jab but this time round I am semi awake and I can still hear the surrounding.
After not long, I hear Dr Lau says total there is 8. Which means total of 8 follicles retrieved I guess. I was a little disappointed as it is actually lesser than before which I have 12. Chances of having good follicles definitely lessen.
I can feel I am pushed to one corner which I believed is the resting lounge to rest. The nurse tried to wake me up and hear my response. Shortly she asked me to wake up and drink a cup of milo. In my heart, all took place so shortly and I'm afraid DH is not ready to fetch me so I hesitate awhile. But they seem so enthusiastic to get me out of bed, so I abide to their instruction to get change and wait at the waiting area for DH. I was done at about 10.30am. So I waited...tick tock, tick tock and almost 1 1/2 hr has passed. He is still not here. Nurse knowing that DH is not here so she asked me to wait outside of the theatre instead. I was getting very sad and emotional at this moment. So I message him again and asked if he is done. He says he is done with the early meeting and he need to go back in the afternoon. I was so angry as he told me he will be taking half day leave today.After that he gave me a call asking if he should come to the clinic to fetch me or I can go down meet him. I told him I am still feeling abit dizzy and cramp. I was very sad and my tears keep rolling...I feel he has been irresponsible and taking things for granted. I am doing this for him and now he seem to push everything to me. Soon after I told him to come find me, I dropped the call.
I didn't continue to wait in the clinic and went out to wait instead as it was very cold in there and I felt so hungry. I waited at the taxi stand and he came after about 30 mins. He started to feel sorry and I rejected his offer to help me.
I asked him to drop me off when we reach home and I will go buy food myself. After that he told me he is not going back to office already. Which means sometimes he can still make the decision but he prefer not to and follows whatever is planned. This is what I hate about him and this shows work is more important than his family.
I told him I have a gut feeling this time I may not be so lucky, and I will not do the procedure again no matter what the result is. The feeling of neglectant is so awful and I feel I am doing all this just for my self and I am fighting hard alone. Though the first time is a smooth process but this time is different especially I have a son who needs my attention and care plus he is not here with me to share the burden.
Saturday, October 4, 2014
3rd IVF review
Went for another review and follicle has slightly grown in size. I need to continue with both jabs for another 4 days and Tuesday night is the day to go 24hrs KKH clinic for Pregnly jab at 10.30pm for inducing ovulation. Thursday is the day for retrieval of egg and it is also the start of my hospitalization leave.
Friday, October 3, 2014
2nd review since last Saturday.
Luckily I have my parents to help as it was a school holiday for Davian and coincidentally I have to go for review. Hubby is not around so they followed me to the clinic and help watched over my DS when I'm having my review. Thank God they are always here for me.
My follicles are 5 on each side and the result is pretty good as the biggest is about 13.
I was told to go back to inject with a dose of Gonal and I am prescribed with orgalutran for tomorrow.
But...I was too careless and mistakenly injected the orgalutran again where I am suppose to have Gonal jab. I called KKHIVF immediately and luckily someone picked up my call and the nurse can hear me sound very panicky. I told her what had happened and she help me consult Dr Lau. Not long after, she gave me a rang and luckily Dr Lau says its ok if I have injected the wrong one. Orgalutran is a blocker and preventing the LH from raising so it will not change any process even though I have injected twice for a day. I was instructed to continue injecting with Gonal 225 dose and remembering not to double the dose. I did as was told and suppose to go back tomorrow for review. And after that I need to purchase for another dose of Orgalutran tomorrow again.
Hope everything goes well for me and not Dr trying to console me.
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